I can read the hesitation in your eyes

feel the tremble of your voice, which belies the confidence


you can’t read the resolution in my smile

that I can and will just walk away on a dime, without thinking twice or looking back

I don’t have time for those who don’t make time for me.


Ingrid Michaelson – Maybe (Official Music Video)


what’s in a name?

fascinating…. I entered my full name into this online site that purportedly analyzes the meaning of your name for free….

I’m kinda flattered…of course, I don’t agree with it all and take it with a grain of salt…but still insightful

what does your name say about you:


Your number is: 7

The characteristics of #7 are: Analysis, understanding, knowledge, awareness, studious, meditating.

The expression or destiny for #7:
Thought, analysis, introspection, and seclusiveness are all characteristics of the expression number 7. The hallmark of the number 7 is a good mind, and especially good at searching out and finding the truth. You are so very capable of analyzing, judging and discriminating, that very little ever escapes your observation and deep understanding. You are the type of person that can really get involved in a search for wisdom or hidden truths, often becoming an authority on whatever it is your are focusing on. This can easily be of a technical or scientific nature, or it may be religious or occult, it matters very little, you pursue knowledge with the same sort of vigor. You can make a very fine teacher, or because of a natural inclination toward the spiritual, you may become deeply emerged in religious affairs or even psychic explorations. You tend to operate on a rather different wavelength, and many of your friends may not really know you very well. The positive aspects of the 7 expression are that you can be a true perfectionist in a very positive sense of the word. You are very logical, and usually employ a quite rational approach to most things you do. You can be so rational at times that you almost seem to lack emotion, and when you are faced with an emotional situation, you may have a bit of a problem coping with it. You have excellent capabilities to study and learn really deep and difficult subjects, and to search for hidden fundamentals. At full maturity you are likely to be a very peaceful and poised individual.

If there is an over supply of the number 7 in your makeup, the negative aspects of the number may be apparent. The chief negative of 7 relates to the limited degree of trust that you may have in people. A tendency to be highly introverted can make you a bit on the self-centered side, certainly very much self-contained . Because of this, you are not very adaptable, and you may tend to be overly critical and intolerant. You really like to work alone, at your own pace and in your own way. You neither show or understand emotions very well.

Your Soul Urge number is: 2

A Soul Urge number of 2 means:
With the Soul Urge number 2, your motivation is centered on friendships, partnerships, and companionship. You want to work with others as a part of a cooperative team. Leadership is not important to you, but making a contribution to the team effort is. You are willing to work hard to achieve a harmonious environment with sensitive, genial people.

In a positive sense, the 2 Soul Urge is sympathetic, extremely concerned and devoted. The nature tends to be very sensitive to others, always tactful and diplomatic. This element in your nature indicates that you are rather emotional. You are persuasive, but in a very quiet way, never forceful. You are the type that makes really close friendships because you are so affectionate and loving.

If this number is over-emphasized in your makeup, you may be over-sensitive, with a delicate ego that is too easily hurt. You may be timid or fearful, too easygoing for your own good.

Your Inner Dream number is: 5

An Inner Dream number of 5 means:
You dream of being totally free and unrestrained by responsibility. You see yourself conversing and mingling with the natives in many nations, living for adventure and life experiences. You imagine what you might accomplished.



================ on compromise

some quick anecdotes on compromise

I had lunch with a friend and coworker three days ago. we went to a nice place – I ordered a burger….but that place usually makes their burgers medium rare by default (I forget that, but she remembered). so as soon as I told our server I’ll take the burger she interjected that “you want it well done though right?” I said yes. the server took note.

I thanked her for remembering and making sure I had my meat the way I liked it. That’s what real friends do… they sing the song in your heart when you forget the words. They walk with you in the shade and the sun… and they remind you of your own true self and tastes when you’re too busy to remember…

I met another friend for a belated birthday celebration with and for her. At first we settled at a bar for 9 PM…then she wanted to change her mind for some other issues… I said 7 PM…. and she came back with 8 PM to compromise in between…. it worked out well… in any relationship you always compromise.

I should know… I’m in politics/government…. you don’t always get all you want. It’s all give and take.

I have other friends who remind me to cut back on soda, or feed my bad habit and order me a cherry coke….

true friends do that too


from where I stand

I’m not understood because you get my exposition

not my illustration

yet I can read your face from a mile away

and you can’t read a single line on my face.

but what boils my blood is how I can’t reconcile what I see from what I perceive.

but that doesn’t register much to others.


“With me, illusions are bound to be shattered. I am here to shatter all illusions. Yes, it will irritate you, it will annoy you – that’s my way of functioning and working. I will sabotage you from your very roots! Unless you are totally destroyed as a mind, there is no hope for you.” 
― Osho

more good stuff here:

let me tell you something, sweetheart

“There is a teaching on the three kinds of awakening: awakening from the dream of ordinary sleep, awakening at death from the dream of life, and awakening into full enlightenment from the dream of delusion.”


– Pema Chodron