A dear friend friend asked to have lunch with me today…. and she confided in me a terrible thing…
Her boyfriend that she’s been going steady with just passed away…. a few things she learned…. many hard things she found out that were hard to swallow and she didn’t want to know……
Found out the hard way that he was cheating on her before he died…. that he was doing drugs….and that was probably part of the real reason he died (OD). Some people tried to hide her from the truth…as if shielding her would make her present suffering any better or easier to take…some still try to hide things from her…. I’ve encouraged to stop looking for things…. she might find more she need not/doesn’t want to know….
Found out the fucking lowlife punk ass never really finalized his divorce as he lied …. his fucking crazy controlling ex-wife called my friend on her from HIS cell AFTER HE DIED….
I was quite sad, empathetic and furious…. but I listened…. and I assured her her best closure now is to move on, forgive herself above all else….and she conceded that is the hardest thing…. to feel foolish and forgive yourself in spite of all the red flags you should have seen…..
I urged her to find her own closure…and find strength in those she has left…those who love her,,, those who she can lean on for support… those who care about her… friends and family and relatives who have always and will always be there.
I’m glad she’s going to counseling to help get over this…. very tragic and unfortunate…supremely humiliating, angering, frustrating and demeaning, fucking terrible shit.
I was furious but I held back my emotions….I tried my best to be calm and controlled, strong and empathetic…. I can’t display too much anger at first…. it’s unfair to the friend…. they have enough of their own emotions to deal with… I shouldn’t drive them away with my own anger and burden them with it……
With time… she’ll move on.
The most important thing you can give a fellow human being is your time… your ear….
Because time is something you can’t take back, get back,….. a resource that is an exponent of love itself….you can only give it to those who matter…. and those who don’t matter and love you will be stingy with their time…and likewise those who love you will be there and give you time and a listening ear no matter what….
VALUE THE FRIEND WHO WILL CHECK THEIR SCHEDULE TO MAKE TIME FOR YOU
BUT CHERISH THE FRIEND WHO CARES NOT TO CONSULT THEIR CALENDAR AT ALL FOR YOU
AND NEVER LET THOSE FRIENDS GO
HEAVEN KNOWS WE ALL NEED FRIENDS LIKE THAT TO WALK IN WHEN THE WORLD WALKS OUT
I’ll keep in touch and make sure she’s hanging in there alright and doing OK as she moves forward with her life.
BUT AIN’T THAT SOME SHIT
motherfucking piece of shit punk ass bastard …
you only gain the strength of that which you overcome